Well, maybe not all cops are assholes, but at least most are. I'm sure that in big cities the cops are all honorable and they get their jobs done and they don't give you shit for the stupid little things. Either that or their corrupt. But in small towns like the one where I live, we have a third type of cop: the power tripping cop.

          These cops will give you shit for just about anything. I mean seriously, you can get busted for jaywalking. That's how bad the cops around here are. They will actually bring you to their car, put you in the back, and then drive around in circles while they discuss the dangers of jaywalking. The only real danger of course is that you might end up dead and then they'd have to do paperwork.

          But seriously, these cops are complete assholes. They will bust you for anything, no matter how small and insignificant it is. But that's not even the worst part. While they're worrying about all the stupid little crimes, they're letting the big ones go without punishment. Me and some chicks (not some chicks and I) were hanging out under a bridge and as we're coming out from under it a cop approaches us.

Cop: What were you doing down there?

Me: Just hanging out.

Cop: Were you having sex?

Me: Yes. It's -8 degrees out, we're in perfect view of the road, there are 6 of us, and we were down there having sex.

Cop: Really?

Me: No, that was sarcasm.

Cop:  I guess you can go then.

          Yeah, instead of asking if we were down there drinking, or doing drugs, or fashioning weapons to sell to the Koreans, he asked if we were having sex. And the way he said ' I guess you can go' made it sound as if he was going to keep us there. Without any crime against us, I would have just walked away. With a crime against us I probably would have ran instead.

          Cops around here really need to learn to stick to the real crimes. I mean, you're wasting your time reprimanding me for littering while the kids over there are getting stoned. Then when you stop me for jaywalking, some kid is getting the shit beat out of him. Good job, you're the most useless cops I've ever seen, and I used to live in Jersey.