My original idea with that first rant had been to do multiple rants that went directly against Chris's rants and then to tell you idiots that you'd been had, but that seemed like a pretty damn boring thing to do, so instead I'm just telling you right now. If you read it right now, you'll find that certain things were changed to better fit reality. Yes, that includes the picture, you can now see the real me.

So instead of building up the joke, I think I'll rant about something that actually dignifies a rant. Like you idiots who believed that I was some emo. Do you really think Chris would let an emo run the site? Of course not, Chris regularly beats on emos. There's no way he would even socialize with an emo.

Seriously, you guys are complete idiots if you thought that I was an emo. All that talk about being manly, followed by a picture of some guy wearing chicks pants? No. Real men do not wear women's clothing. Real men only associate with women when they need sex.

Ranting about how stupid you guys are is boring. How about instead I rant about how amazing I am compared to you? On a scale of 1 to 10, you rank a 2 ( an extra point above most people because you read this site) and I rank a 9. I would rank a 10, but the scales are fixed so that only Chris can ever get above a 9. 

David must be a good name for ranting, because there's another David at this other rant site, Chris mentioned him before and said he was pretty good. How's that for kickass? I'm most likely better than the other David though, because I am the best David that ever lived. Seriously, I would kick the other David's ass.

I'm still waiting on a title for myself. I'm thinking something along the lines of SuperMegaUltraGuy, but that's just a thought. I figured if I got tired of typing it I could just shorten it and call myself SMUG but then I noticed that that's a word and I wouldn't want it to look like I'm trying to be cute.